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They emphasized respect for self and others in intimate encounters, and openly addressed masturbation, oral sex, homosexuality and orgasm. Teens assert independence by breaking rules, rupturing their relationships with parents, separating from the family. The sexual revolution transformed attitudes in both countries, but, whereas American parents and policymakers responded by treating teen sex as a health crisis, the Dutch went another way: American parents consider adolescents to be innately rebellious, in thrall to their "raging hormones. According to Amy Schalet, an associate professor of sociology at the University of Massachusetts, in the late s the Dutch — like Americans — roundly disapproved of premarital sex. Follow the Opinion section on Twitter latimesopinion and Facebook. A full two-thirds of Dutch teens 15 to 17 with a steady boyfriend or girlfriend report that the person was welcome to spend the night in their bedrooms.

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The Dutch actively discourage promiscuity in their children, teaching that sex should emerge from a loving relationship.

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Worried about your teenage daughter? Move to the Netherlands

According to Amy Schalet, an associate professor of sociology at the University of Massachusetts, in the late s the Dutch — like Americans — roundly disapproved of premarital sex. The American girls had become sexually active at a younger age than the Dutch, had had more encounters with more partners and were less likely to use birth control. Byfour out of five Dutch youth said that their first sexual experiences were well timed, within their control and fun. We are a more diverse nation than Holland, with higher rates of childhood poverty, fewer social welfare guarantees and more social conservatives. It's not just about sex, though. In subsequent interviews with some of the participants, the Americans described interactions that were "driven by hormones," in which boys determined relationships, male pleasure was prioritized and reciprocity was rare. Here's a solution for parents concerned about their daughters' sex lives:

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